It’s not like I’m a super physically gifted climber or anything – there are definitely climbers I know who are stronger than I am. I think it’s my motivation, drive and passion for climbing that’s got me where I am today, that makes me different to the others.
I started climbing as a kid and ended up meeting someone at high school who also climbed. We started going to places like Joshua Tree National Park for some real climbs – we didn’t do anything crazy difficult at that time – we were just starting out and still learning. Objectively difficult or not, those were probably some of the most dangerous climbs of my life. We didn’t know what we were doing and I had nowhere near the physical strength I have now. We got carried away and took on climbs that we weren’t quite ready for.
As I progressed, I became more confident. I knew I had it in me to do the climbs I was attempting – so I went for it, every time, even when I probably shouldn’t have. And every time I succeeded, I got spurred on to something more extreme. I’ve done loads of things that I’m super proud of. The climb I’m proudest of was free soloing The Thousand Altitudes in Eldorado Canyon, Colorado. It was definitely the hardest climb I’ve ever done without a rope. I’d done it loads of times with a rope but this was something else – it was such a mental challenge to convince myself I could and should do it. I get so in the zone during those climbs – I’m in such a bubble of focus that I genuinely don’t think of anything else. And I think this is where it started going wrong for me.
Honestly, I’ve had a lot of accidents. I’ve broken multiple toes, my right ankle twice, my left ankle once, my elbow, and even my back. That’s all in the last 10 or 15 years. Nothing was really deterring me though – they were just unfortunate accidents in my mind – they weren’t warning signs that I was going too hard, too often.
With the back injury though, I was definitely being reckless. I was climbing so much and hadn’t taken a break in a long time. I was going from climb to climb, not resting properly and not training properly because I hadn’t had an experience that had really shaken me. The broken back did exactly that. That day, a big winter storm was rolling in and was going to close the route for the year. I wasn’t going to be in the region when it reopened, so it was my last chance to climb it. In hindsight, I knew I wasn’t totally ready. Sure enough, I fell and badly hurt myself.
This injury meant, for the first time, that I was forced to slow down. It took a long time to heal and I couldn’t climb during that time. I had a lot of time to think. I realized that in the months leading up to the accident, although my motivation had been at its highest, I was climbing recklessly. I started to reassess things – I realized I needed to slow down and understand what was dangerous for me with my skill set and climbing style. I realized it wasn’t always worth going for the climb. It was much more important to make sure I was ready for it first. It was something I’d always known but had pushed to the back of my mind for the sake of the send. I think this injury really forced me to stop and think about how I approach everything. I needed to be more careful in my climbs – and take more time off. The exhaustion was just too dangerous.
The couple of years I’ve had climbing since the fall have actually been pretty successful for me. Since that experience and realization, I’ve started to get a better idea of what I can and cannot do – what is and isn’t dangerous. I know I can find the middle ground – something that’s fun and that I can be proud of, but not something that entails the risks that I was taking before. I’m always going to push myself to do better, but it’s about making sure I don’t push myself in the wrong ways – and know when to stop.
To read more about Brad’s climbing experiences, click here.
Photographs by Drew Smith.